This site reflects an unedited version of my life. It is strange to me that I chose to share it with you. For a variety of reasons, I’m at a stage in life where I’m ready to be seen for exactly what I am. This – what I am – changes by the moment, by the breath. As best I can tell, I’m just a love/hate/flow turned into a living social media experiment.

I know hate. I know work. I know holding on and letting go and learning to flow. I want to believe that True Love Exists. I wonder if you have seen it? I want to hear what you have to say.

Content is organized under love letters and hate mail (both of those seem self explanatory). (work)Flow is for the things in between, the part of me that tries to make sense of love/hate, the part of me that works and tries (not a good word) to flow.

Let me know how you’re dealing. Leave me a comment on a post.

Deal with your feelings photo gallery

The inspiration behind it

A three-month trip I took to Morocco last summer with my three year old girl. Navigating Morocco -both socially and physically – is tough, particularly for a couple of chicks. Street names are outdated or nonexistent, so even if you can find an up-to-date map (unlikely) it is useless. And my communication skills were very limited, as was my social context there. We were perpetually lost. Each of us having tantrums. I thought I would break her. She reverted back to pull-ups after being successfully potty-trained in the States.

I took a picture of her crying on a particularly dark day. It hurt me to take it. But looking back at the photos, moments later she was clean and content. I realized feelings scare adults more than they do kids. I wanted to step in and control the situation for her, but I had to let her feel her way through. She did. She’s OK.

Today, I am trying to look at myself in the same way. Without judging my feelings, observe them. Consider what they are telling me. Think of them like colors. This is not an action (actions are where judgments can be placed) but an intention. It hurts a little to look at feelings. But, they are real. They are natural. They are as much a part of us as the things we do with them.

I almost called the gallery “Grow the Fuck Up” but we don’t really grow up emotionally. At least, I haven’t. Can’t seem to. I kind of *love* that about myself.

What does it mean to be ashamed of a feeling?

(are you ashamed of being hungry or tired?)

Deal with your feelings photo gallery.

So, that’s the inspiration for the show. I like it. Let me know what you think. Leave a comment on at the bottom of the post page.